10 Tips for less overwhelm and more joy this holiday season
Last night I finally sat down and thought about the week we just had (sick kid, husband traveling, family visiting, school commitments, work commitments, social commitments, Shabbat prep and cooking, and so on) and it suddenly occurred to me that all 3 kids have the entire week of Thanksgiving OFF. And I had not planned ANYTHING for them. Instead of allowing the panic to set in, I reached to the resources I had and started to plan. I know I may be infamously late to the game, but then started thinking about what I could do to plan for the rest of the holiday season. I love love LOVE the holiday season. And I’m sure you can relate; sometimes the hecticness, the planning, the hosting, the traveling can make the holidays just so much more stressful and kind of suck out the joy that we so look forward to. So how do we put some joy back into the holidays? I’m sharing with you some tips I have leaned into in the past and plan to use right now.
Say No, and Say Yes. Say “No” to events and plans that add more stress than joy, and say “Yes” to things that bring you fulfillment and joy. There are so many events, activities, and obligations, but if they just make us more stressed and burned out, doesn’t that negate the joyousness that we are trying to spread and emulate ourselves? Don’t be afraid to postpone some get togethers for after the New Year. You will probably enjoy them more anyway after the holidays! It’s ok to protect your time this time of year. Less stress, more JOY.
Create space. Create space in your calendar, and in your day. If you plan back to back to back, it makes a more burned out and stressed out you. Block out the days or times that you want to soak in and enjoy with your family, or times of day that allow you to relax, plan, prep, etc. Create more time for JOY.
Don’t be afraid to ask. For help, for a dish, for a more convenient location to meet up. I love hosting, and I usually say no when someone offers to bring something. But it’s ok to ask! Especially if someone is offering. Make a list of items that would be helpful for family and friends to bring to dinners, get togethers, etc, and when someone asks, give them an item on the list to be in charge of. Less on yourself, and more space for JOY.
Shop “early.” I am laughing at myself with this one, since I am well aware that we are mid-November, but we still have time! I know that I am not the only one who is overwhelmed by Black Friday week, many small businesses (PK included!) have started their Black Friday sales earlier in the month. You still have time to take this coming week to scout out sales and deals and get some (if not most!) of your shopping list taken care of and avoid rush shipping or shipping delays. Then items that you can get much easier, you can save for early December and still get your shopping done way ahead of most! (and enJOY the holiday season without that hanging over you!)
Pack early. For holiday travel (or any travel for that matter) I constantly find myself with the 3 kiddos packing the night before and doing laundry until the last hour, and it is SO stressful! You can simplify this! Pack early, make some time in your calendar to do this. If you’re not traveling but ned to be prepared, set aside complete holiday outfits before the get togethers and events. Not just for the kids, for you too! You will feel more organized and less stressed out to the last minute. More time for JOY.
Try to host earlier. If you are the host, and you have flexibility on date or time, try to host earlier. Earlier in the day, earlier in the week. If your events are stacked, end of day, end of week and you are hosting, it can feel like a lot on you. For example, there are those of us who prefer a brunch to a dinner because we can enjoy the rest of the day and not be so tired at the end (and trying to get people out of our house and get to bed). If you have the flexibility, try it. More space for enJOYing your event!
Plan activities for the kids. We are so focused on the event, the food, etc, I often think last minute about the events or activities for the kids when I am hosting. And they need to have something to do too! This is a great time to look for holiday-themed crafts, games, local events in your area, all kid-friendly. It’s also a great opportunity to plan the family friendly events (other than the food/meals). Involve the kids in the cooking or baking that they can help with, putting together gifts or homemade cards, and plan meaningful ways to spend time together - so much JOY!
Put out the healthy snack tray. All during October leading up to Halloween already opens the sugar floodgates, and it doesn’t really slow down does it? Healthy eating is self care, and while enjoying the holiday goodies, it’s great to plan ahead for healthy eating as a family so that everyone feels good too. Prepping fruit and veggie mixes into snack bags or boxes in the fridge is a great way to have easy grab and go for the kids (or you!) in between the holiday meals. We’ve also been a huge fan of the fruit and veggie snack tray. When we get home from school and they are hungry, or if we are between activities on a weekend, or when it’s not dinnertime but they need something, I’ve been putting out a tray of sliced apples, clementines, cucumber and usually a salty snack (pretzels or crackers). We all love to snack on this and then no one is hangry! You can make it holiday themed, adding nuts or charcuterie meats or cheeses too. More JOYous.
Make gift giving more meaningful. I have spoken to so many friends about this already this season. The reality is, many of us don’t want the gifts for ourselves (or our homes!) After all, holiday time is about spending the time together. Less, more meaningful gifts. If you can have a conversation about it with your family members, this is a great opportunity. Especially for the little kiddos. We have already been talking about gift receiving this year with my older girls (age 5 and 7). We talked about taking inventory of current toys and making a donation box so other kids can enjoy the toys they no longer play with. We talked about picking one “bigger” gift for Hanukkah that they can choose (and then I add a few smaller gifts that are also more practical). This has had them so excited, they have thought about it, compared ideas of the toy or game they want, and it really feels like they are focusing on something that will bring them joy and excitement (versus 20 gifts that they will forget about as soon as they open them). Much more JOY!
Go for Self Care. However this looks for you, do it. Don’t be afraid to take care of #1! We are hosting, cooking, driving, organizing, volunteering, cleaning, packing, etc etc etc… Self care could be a 15 minute walk each day, allowing yourself to go to bed early (without guilt of doing more laundry or dishes!), something more indulgent like a facial or massage, or my personal favorite this time of year - relaxing with popcorn, tea, and hallmark and lifetime holiday movies… YES! We need it, plan it, schedule it, you will not regret it! More you-JOY.
